'A heart can be broken; but it keeps beating just the same." (Fried Green Tomatoes)
... it's Valentine's Day but unlike the others, i spent this day facing my laptop to prepare for a talk... it's not that i'm wishing for someone to ask me out... i simply want to spend the day resting since this week will be really busy... i found myself so busy - thinking, writing and printing all sorts of things... the only good thing i remember doing is sleeping till around 10am...
preparing the talk was what occupied my mind and i didn't even care that my heart wasn't really into it... while doing so, i thought of famous movie lines as my introduction for it... and then i came upon some of my favorite lines... i felt a bit strange reading them when i was not mindful of them before... and for some time now, i who has been recovering from a heartbreak felt that so many of them really touched some nerves...
the one i quoted above became my favorite today... indeed, a broken heart doesn't stop beating and i realized, i'm still alive... heartbreaks may become a part of anyone's life but there is still life... it's amazing how the heart can bear such pain and still beat life to a person's body... it dawned on me that life never stopped for me when i was hurt or when my heart was broken... it continued... there is hope to move on... a courage to face each day even if memories intrude the mind every now and then and tears spring from my eyes, life has not ended and therefore i have hope...
reading the book of Job nowadays, i feel ashamed of how i treat the pain i have gone through... there is no way my broken heart compares to what happened to him... sometimes pain can force you to look upon yourself and the trouble you're in... you forget to look up and thank God for whatever He has blessed you with... even if pain is troublesome, it is good that we can feel it still... there are some who are not blessed to feel pain anymore... and i wonder if they feel the pain of a broken heart... the lepers for example do not feel pain anymore... i wonder if they feel a heartbreak... hmmmm... just a thought...
however painful it may be... a heart that once was broken will one day heal and maybe, learn to love again... the lesson has been learned... and there will be another test... maybe even harder than the first... and the will must surrender or a terrible heartbreak happens again... another breaking... but living still...
so what will it be? a whole heart beating or a broken heart living?
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