lullabye of grace

Hello po! Kumusta po kayo? Another school year has passed. We face yet another year of being with the students, meeting them at their points of need, sharing to them life stories, events & learning. Let me share to you some thoughts & stories gathered as I have journeyed this far.

Whispers of Grace
Kawayan Camp ’07 has just come to a close. For a field staff like me, this was another experience of God’s abundant grace, provision & faithfulness. He is indeed the God who calls & where He calls He sustains. Praise His Name!

Being in the EXEC (first time) has taught me a lot of lessons. Learnings about work & balance, grace & consistency, love & discipline, humility & mistakes, people & humanity compose my KC07 experience. There were times when I asked God why I was placed in a position I felt I didn’t fit. And I am always humbled…it’s not what I can do, but what He can do through my willingness to be used. The Lord is glorified in my weaknesses for there He works powerfully for His Name’s sake. What more can I ask? There is much greater things to see here than meets the eye. So I am quieted by His reassuring grace. He will work in ways far beyond what my mind can imagine. He did.

After KC, we had a short trip to Boracay. That was my first time to be there. I thank the Lord for Gerlen who had welcomed us to their home. We stayed in Roxas and went to Boracay for an overnight getaway. Took some pictures and a little swimming experience. It was a wonderful privilege.

When I look back at my KC experience, I can see & declare how God’s hand of grace is ever present, constantly & consistently at work in the lives of the students, of all of us & most significantly in mine. He deserves all the praise & the glory!

Remembrances
As this school year approaches, I rejoice in remembering how the Lord has sustained my weakening heart. My second year in staff work is coming to a close. And even as I face this year with all the uncertainties it is bringing, I choose to remember Him who called me; He who promised to be faithful.

The past year was hard. Transitions are never easy; I can say that with a deep conviction. The ‘year that was’ has left me wanting for more answers but I have been asking more questions instead. How do I make sense of all the realities surrounding life in staff work? Oh well…I sigh. The Lord’s grace saw me through all these before so I choose to hope and trust in Him. He who promised is faithful! Amen!

As this journey continues, I choose to bring with me this song that caught me unaware of the overwhelming grace of God.

Made Me Glad

I will bless the Lord forever
I will trust Him at all times
He has delivered me from all fear
He has set my feet upon a rock
I will not be moved
And I'll say of the Lord


You are my shield, my strength
My portion, deliverer
My shelter, strong tower
My very present help in time of need

Whom have I in heaven but You
There's none I desire beside You
You have made me glad
And I'll say of the Lord

You are my shield, my strength
My portion, deliverer
My shelter, strong tower
My very present help in time of need

I’ve just finished reading ‘RUN WITH HORSES’ by Eugene Peterson, a book which spoke volumes about Jeremiah’s life as a prophet, as a human, as a servant of God. Reading the book has given me several things to think about specifically in this line of work. What really struck me was the part where he reflected on practicality & hope. My favorite lines are: “Hope acts on the conviction that God will complete what He has begun even when the appearances, especially when the appearances, oppose it.”; “It takes courage to have hope. But it is the only practical action that survives the decay of the moment and escapes the scrapheap of yesterday’s fashion.” This book led me to remember who I really am. And so I move forward with every little bit of hope I can muster.

Hopes
Hopeful, that’s what I am right now. With this hope, it is my prayer that the Lord would strengthen my feeble hands & weakening heart. This coming year is going to be another journey of faith with Him. =)

“Put out into the deep.” This has been the constant reminder I have received from the Lord in my moments with Him. I remember Kuya Herman’s exposition in our staff conference last January where he shared about Peter’s experience of walking on water; how the Lord had beckoned him and yet he still doubted and sank. Help me pray for courage to ‘venture into the deep’ as this new school tear opens up before me.

Trusting God for His sovereign wisdom, would you pray with me for the following?

1. Financial support in joining OMF’s AFMC (Asian Frontiers Missions Conference) this August 24 – 27 in Jakarta, Indonesia; raising around $350 for my registration fee, air fare & pocket money.
2. Wisdom & creativity in training student-leaders in my new assignments this year.
3. My brother’s on-going medication for primary complex; he needs to be healthy for his upcoming elbow operation.
4. Gracious heart & steadfast spirit.

I would like to know how you’ve been. It would be nice to hear from you & how the Lord has graced your life nowadays. Please email me at grace1679@gmail.com. It would be an honor & a great privilege to pray with & for you.

“So we're not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace. These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us. There's far more here than meets the eye. The things we see now are here today, gone tomorrow. But the things we can't see now will last forever.” 2 Cor. 4: 16-18






Trusting still,
rachel

a song of new depths

As If We Never Said Goodbye
(Barbara Streisand)

I don’t know why I’m frightened
I know my way around here
The cardboard trees, the painted scenes, the sound here.
Yes a world to rediscover,
But I’m not in any hurry
And I need a moment.

The whispered conversations in overcrowded hallways,
The atmosphere as thrilling here as always
Feel the early morning madness
Feel the magic in the making
Why everything’s as if we never said goodbye.

I’ve spent so many mornings
Just trying to resist you
I’m trembling now
You cant know how I’ve missed you,
Missed the fairy-tale adventures
In this ever-spinning playground
We were young together.

I’m coming out of make-up
The lights already burning,
Not long until the cameras will start turning
And the early morning madness
And the magic in the making...
Yes, everything is as if we never said goodbye.

I don’t want to be alone that’s all in the past,
This worlds waited long enough,
I’ve come home at last!

And this time will be bigger,
And brighter than we knew it.
So watch me fly, we all know I can do it...
Could I stop my hand from shaking?
Has there ever been a moment with so much to live for?

The whispered conversations in overcrowded hallways,
So much to say not just today but always.
Well have early morning madness.
Well have magic in the making.
Yes, everything is as if we never said goodbye...
Oh, please don’t ever, ever make me say goodbye!!!

in the midst of uncertainties

so this is where i have been placed...
not that i have regrets of being here or choosing to be here...
i only pray i could understand more...because will not be able to know more...
just the same, i hope to become more conscious of grace at work in my life...
uncertainties lurk at every corner of each day i face...
where do i put my trust...how do i reconcile the truth of the Word in the life i am living...each day seems to bring more hardship...more bitterness...more agony...more anguish...

kc07

sighs....

this song very well speaks of a longing common to any human being...i believe that love is one the most important needs of mankind but it is something we long to receive more than to give...this song is a message of love...of how in vain we try to do things on our own only to find out later that we only need to cultivate love in our hearts...

i have loved this song the moment i heard it from the soundtrack of Music & Lyrics. in many ways, iwas able to identify the sentiments of the writer of this beautiful love song...i pray that i would always be conscious of this need to love others who are more needy than i am...who are longing & crying out for love...

Back into Love

I've been living with a shadow overhead

I've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed

I've been lonely for so long

Trapped in the past, I just can't seem to move on

I've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away

Just in case I ever need em again someday

I've been setting aside time

to clear a little space in the corners of my mind

All I want to do is find a way back into love

I can't make it through without a way back into love

Oh oh oh

I've been watching but the stars refuse to shine

I've been searching but I just don't see the signs

I know that it's out there

There's got to be something for my soul somewhere

I've been looking for someone to shed some light

Not somebody just to get me through the night

I could use some direction

And I'm open to your suggestions

All I want to do is find a way back into love

I can't make it through without a way back into love

And if I open my heart again

I guess I'm hoping you'll be there for me in the end

oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

There are moments when I don't know if it's real

Or if anybody feels the way

I need inspiration

Not just another negotiation

All I want to do is find a way back into love

I can't make it through without a way back into love

And if I open my heart to you

I'm hoping you'll show me what to do

And if you help me to start again

You know that I'll be there for you in the end

oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

hmmm...birthday girl

tuesday, january 16, 2007. this is the day i celebrated my 28th birthday...how time flies...

birthday girl..this is what one of my co-staff always call me since that day...would you believe it was my first time to celebrate my natal day with a cake?...i cried...because i was touched by the love of the people i have been with even if it was just over one year...i was touched by their gift...friendship & family.

i realized that the Lord has brought me to a place where i can be myself and be loved just the same...

isn't it a wonder?

i never expected i would have a cake that day...it was our last day in the conference and i was thinking i didn't have enough money to spend for these people who are just so wonderful...

i have so many things to be thankful for...

the Lord has been so good...He has given me opportunities where His name will be glorified...while it's true that my life doesn't always please Him, His grace is just so amazing that i have no words left to speak...

i can only thank Him, praise Him and offer to Him the best i got...my life...and it will never be enough...i know...but i'm glad to serve Him wherever He calls me...whenever...